The Trials of a Commuter

I drove to work yesterday. That’s a standard practice for millions of British workers but it hasn’t been for me. Not since my company moved down to London 3 and half years ago. In that time I have only driven to work 3 times previously, so I enjoyed the variety that driving gave me yesterday.

When I used to commute to Cambridge I got bored of having to rely on the unpredictability of trains, train drivers, fellow commuters, train tracks, British weather and those who thought that jumping in front of a train would be a good way to end it all. Not being in control of my destiny (or at least my journey back home) frustrated me. When I got a job in Peterborough and had to drive for the first time it was exciting. Certainly scary as despite passing my test 2 years previously I hadn’t driven regularly since then and definitely not for long distances. I literally had to teach myself to drive again.

But once I got the hang of it driving was exciting. I am by no means whatsoever a car fanatic; people who talk about cars bore me. But once I got over the nerves and anxiety I found driving enjoyable. I enjoyed the fact that I was in control of my own destiny (or at least my own destination) and the sheer buzz that I got from being in control of a potential one tonne death machine. It is testament to the wonders of the human subconscious that millions of people can drive harmoniously every day, without incident and without even really thinking about it.

The fundamental difference between driving to work and getting the train to work is adrenalin. Driving along a winding fenland road, an icy river to your left and an articulated lorry coming at you on your right produces adrenalin. Overtaking a tractor at 50 miles an hour in fourth gear (I drive a not-even-a-one-litre Vauxhall Corsa so need to drop down a gear if I have to accelerate quickly) in fog with ever brightening foglights coming at you produces adrenalin. Making a split second decision on whether you should pull out at a junction and then having to press the accelerator pedal hard down to the floor when you realise you probably shouldn’t have as there is a much faster car behind you produces adrenalin. Adrenalin is fun. It makes us feel alive. I am by no means an adrenalin junkie but I enjoy the small thrills of driving my (very modest) car. Sitting on a train for hours every day does not produce adrenalin. It produces the opposite of adrenalin.

What’s the opposite of adrenalin? Calmness?  Depression? Lethargy? Probably lethargy.  Sitting on the same train for hours a day is bloody tiring! Whist it is easy to just sit there and be transported to your destination as you do whatever stationary activity you like to best – reading, writing, listing to music, eating, drinking, sleeping, talking, knitting, doing your makeup, marking your student’s work, doing your own work, or playing on your smartphone (by far the most popular choice of my fellow commuters) – it is often just so, well boring.

Sitting on a train for hours every day really takes it out of you. For the last 3 and half years I have spent nearly 4 hours a day travelling to and from work. People ask me how I do it. People ask me if I am mad (I’m not quite sure if they are actually joking or not when they ask this). People ask me why I do it. The last question is the hardest one for me to answer.

Hardness, that is what it comes down to – you have to be mentally very hard to be able to take this daily punishment for a prolonged period of time. I see it in the eyes of my fellow long-distance commuters – the same steely determination, the same black rings around their eyes, and the same sense of resignation that this is how their life is and that it will probably always be like this.

 Image: the solemn faces of every day commuters

But it’s not all bad of course. If like me then you enjoy solitary activities (reading, writing, listening to music, attempting to play the guitar), then the long distance train commute is like escaping into your own private world every day. I’ve done almost everything it is possible to do on a train – read many books, magazines and newspapers, listened to hours of music, listened to dozens of podcasts, written blogs, done work (official and unofficial), watched films, played games on my iPad, made calls to friends and family, chatted to fellow commuters, attempted to sleep (with their horrid florescent lighting, hard seats and minimal leg room it is as if trains have been designed specifically so it is impossible to sleep on them) and messed around with the various phones I’ve owned over the years. I would have liked to have been able to have practiced guitar on the train but that would have had to involve the guarantee of a completely empty carriage to myself every day.

Variety is the spice of life however and despite my attempts to add as much variation to my train journeys as possible it is always good to have a change. That’s why the rare thrill of driving to work gave me so much enjoyment yesterday. The best bit? The car stereo. My stereo is as modest as my car but I still had great fun in selecting the 2 CDs that would accompany on my 2 hour round trip to Peterborough and back. From my Blur 21 box set (released to mark the 21^st anniversary of the band 2 years ago) I chose the Modern Life Is Rubbish rarities CD for the way there and the studio album itself for the way back. Motoring up the A47 in beautiful sunshine I got particular enjoyment from blasting out the Wassailing Song and tapping the steering wheel to the 3/4 time of this unique song. It was certainly a unique experience.

The reason why I drove to work yesterday? Because the ever-changing powers that be in my company have decided to move my team back to Peterborough from London. So it looks like I am going to have to get used to driving again: I know that I’ll enjoy it to start with but eventually it will become a chore. That’s how it was before for me – after 2 and half years of driving for nearly 2 hours a day I welcomed the change that commuting on a train gave me. Now after 3 and a half years of commuting by train and Tube for nearly 4 hours a day I welcome the relief and difference that the shorter car journey will give me. Despite the relocation it looks like I will still get to visit London regularly for my job – perhaps not as much as I would like to but still enough to break up my week.

I look forward to revisiting my CD collection and blasting out my favourite albums in my car, and to also being able to continue enjoying the solitary hours on the train where I can read and write. It’s been very hard work to get to where I am today – the physical and mental pain, the frustration, the sleep deprivation, the reliance on caffeine and paracetamol, the missed opportunities, the sacrifices, the swallowing of pride, the sheer stamina required to get through it all. Finally after all of that I feel like my hard work is starting to pay off.